You know that moment when you stare at the empty ‘post’ field on your dashboard and think, “Gee, I wish I could think of something clever to write about”?

Well, I’m totally there.

So, here I sit, trying to think of something to entertain the masses.

(And by ‘masses’, I mean all three of my regular readers.)

(Hi there you three!!)

As I’m staring at my notoriously messy desk, I’ve decided that I am going to show you that I can be a neat freak.

And, by ’show you’, of course, I mean ‘list for you in typed form’.

Oh yes.

It is true.

I am going to itemize the contents of my spotless purse for you.

You’re excited, eh?

Well, hold on to your seats, my three readers… its going to be one heck of a journey!

1. Two checkbooks. My personal account and Tom’s and my joint account.

2. 3 ballpoint pens, two blue and one black.

3. 1 keyring with keys to Tom’s van and my mother’s house.

4. 1 keyring with keys to my car and our house.

5. My wallet, containing nothing except what is to remain in a wallet - like business cards, credit cards, ID, etc.

6. My cellphone

… uh, the further I get into this, I’ve come to realize that I’ve not cleaned out my purse in a week or so. Damn it, I was trying to impress you all!! Too bad I’m an honest person …

And yet I continue:

6. a travel hairbrush that pops apart each time I attempt to use it, yet I do not replace it.

7. an inhaler that I no longer use, but feel the need to carry with me, just in case.

8. A Pamprin pill bottle that also contains Alieve and Pepto pills, just in case.

9. My sister’s bluetooth headset that she let me borrow that I’ve only used twice. But, I keep it in my purse so I have the ability to be ‘hands free’ in the car. You know … just in case (see a theme here?).

10. chapstick

11. rewetting drops for contacts, which I hardly ever wear, at all.

12. One girlie product, cuz you can never be too sure.

13. Two new redbox movies: Hack and Bee Movie.

14. The receipt to Guitar Hero and the PS2.

15. The receipt for my oil change that didn’t make the check engine light go off.

16. my handwritten directions to the neighboring County Health Department so they could test me about proper food handling techniques, charge me $15 and give me a paper card that keeps me from being fined while working in the food service industry … or as I like to call it, a complete waste of my time.

17. A paycheck stub.

18. The receipt from my grocery shopping today, with a coupon the cashier gave me for Carnation Instant Breakfast, which is the only thing that Tom likes to drink when taking all of his medications.

Okay. I think that’s it.

Which, I guess isn’t that bad, all things considering.

But, normally there is no spare paper in my purse. All those receipts are a nuisance , and get shredded as soon as I get home normally. But, alas, when I attempt to brag, they must be my demise!

Photos? Since I’m still bored:

This is all the contents listed above spread out neatly on my bed.

And this is the standard appearance of my purse.

Note that the papers did not find their way back into the purse for this photo!