I’ve been thinking about how to describe SCI difficulties with bowels without becoming too graphic. Honestly, I don’t know if there’s a way. I personally don’t have a problem with being graphic to explain these details. Yet, I feel that Tom would… and, truly, I wouldn’t blame him at the least.
That being said, I don’t believe I’ll go into the ‘step by step’ regarding bowel issues with a SCI. I’ll just say that there is a routine involving a suppository that must be kept in order to avoid accidents.
The process that Tom and I go through has been nicknamed ‘Red Circle Night’ because I mark the scheduled days on the calendar with a red circle. We also call it ‘Program’.
The act of ‘Red Circle Night’ is not enjoyable for Tom in any way. He hates it. With all of his being. Actually, I don’t like it either.
I recall when Tom was in rehab down in Columbia, when the need came about for me to learn how to manage Tom’s program, I literally cried. I was so upset that I was going to have to take on this task, knowing that Tom’s (and my) dignity was going to have to be set aside during these time periods.
Tom’s program lasts two hours on the nights we have it scheduled. Its not a hands on process throughout those two hours. Its a lot of timed intervals, watching the clock, and waiting.
We’ve just decided to change our previous schedule. We used to do this process every third night. Now we’ve decided to give a set schedule of Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday a whirl and see how it works out.
Not that you’re super interested, but I’ll keep you posted.
Actually, I am interested. i feel that you and Tommy are fmily, and even have you marked in that category on facebook. I know its stupid, I mean, we’ve never even met. But i can’t help how i feel.
I imagine that the loss of bladder and bowel control is the worst part of having a SCI. I imagine it’s worse than losing the ability to walk. It makes me sad that you and tom have to deal with this. But it also makes me proud that he lets you do this with him, and that you are strong enough to be there, through all of it, even the worst parts.
Well, I could give ya the graphics of it all… prolly shouldn’t read it on a full stomach! LOL!
Regarding being marked as ‘family’ on facebook, I’ve got you set as ‘Top Shelf’, which is actually a baby step up from family on my facebook. I stalk my ‘top shelvers’ religiously.
While my father did not have an SCI, when he became bedbound the last few months my mom had to do this for him also. She felt the same way as you, that it was a loss of dignity for both of them, but he preferred having her do it rather than someone else.
Hugs to both of you!! (maybe I will get a post up here soon…nope, got to get back to FB) LOL