Tomorrow we’ve got a routine doctor’s appointment for Tom.

We’ll be discussing the possibility of finding a SCI specialist who accepts Medicare / Medicaid. From the little that I’ve researched, I’ve not had any luck finding someone in our area who accepts these insurances. Do you find that weird? I do.

Do you also find it weird that Tom has not had a SCI specialist since… oh, 2 years after the accident? I do too. Yet, at the same time, not so much. I mean, what’s a SCI doctor going to tell us that we don’t already know by now…? I know there are tons of things to still learn about having a SCI. But, what exactly will pertain to Tom and his situation? Anyhow. I feel that we’ve been on our own long enough, and if we can find someone who knows a thing or two about Tom’s situation, I’d be willing to hear what they have to say.

We’re also going to ask for a colostomy consult. Tom’s not decided that he definitely wants to get one yet. But, he’s to the point that he’ll finally listen about the whole process. I can see how a colostomy would make his quality of life better.

(And, truly, isn’t that what this whole game is about? Trying to make Tom’s life as painless and easy going as possible? That’s how I feel about it, anyhow.)

But, its not me that would be going in for another surgery. Or the one that would have to live with the bag attached to me. So, I don’t blame Tom for holding out on the decision.

After the doctor’s appointment, and depending on weather / how Tom is feeling, maybe we’ll try to find something worth doing around town that’s free and wheelchair friendly. Maybe we’ll finally hit up the Bass Pro a couple towns over that Tom’s been chatting about since its grand opening last year.

Who knows. Its supposed to be cool and rainy. Maybe we’ll just come home and veg in front of the television.

* Err… I mean, later today.

When you go to the doctor because you have an intermittent rash that occurs in random locations on your body, it goes without saying that the rash will not be present at the time of your visit.

Then you must attempt to figure out how to describe the mysterious rash, which… if you knew how to describe it in great detail, you could of told the nurse over the phone the description and saved yourself the $100 bill for coming into the office.

After I suggested I take a picture of it the next time it pops up, of course it would show up on my right hand… making picture taking relatively impossible, since I’m right handed.

Cameras are not made for left-handed-only people, FYI.

I was prescribed a extra strength cortisone (I think) creme for the rash until I can photograph said rash and show the doctor exactly what it looks like.

Oh, and, of course, I didn’t go pick up the creme tonight.

So, of course, I am continuing to scar myself because the rash itches like craaaaaazy and I have no willpower when it comes to not scratching it.

I’d take a picture to show you, but most of the visible ‘damage’ is on my right hand.

I swear its Murphy’s Law.

I just added up what I believe to be all of my medical bills. The total is $4322 for 3 ER visits. Only one of those visits required any medical equipment use, and it was for precaution – not necessity.

I have filled out the paperwork and mailed it in to see about adjusting my bill due to lack of insurance and low income. I’m not certain that I will get the adjustment, though, because they (yes, the infamous THEY) only give you 14 days to complete and mail in the paperwork. Well… uhm… I was not feeling well during each of those 2 week periods, and didn’t get the paperwork mailed in until nearly a month after the last visit to the ER. So, I’m crossing my fingers that they’ll allow the paperwork to go through.

Also, our level payment on our electricity bill has been adjusted, starting this month. It more than doubled. Which, really, I was expecting. The company had set the payment level from when the house was on the market and was vacant for half a year, hence no electricity was used and our bill was lower. I just was really hoping that the bill wouldn’t be adjusted this month.

And, by switching our internet & cable service so we could save money… the new company did not inform us that they expect one months payment upfront. Which means they hit us with an unexpectedly large bill also.

Ooh, and once more – my flipping credit card minimum payment has increased a third as much as well. Which, obviously, if you use your credit card, your payment goes up. But, I’ve almost gotten every monthly charge taken off my credit card. I just had a couple of yearly charges hit my card this month too.

Tom’s van has some issue – like a burning wire smell… and you can actually see the smoke coming from the passenger front wheel well after its been driven. We have no idea what’s happening there. And, my check engine light has been on longer than I would of expected if it was only attempting to clue me in to getting an oil change.

I’m very aggravated that I’ve gotten myself into this stressful situation. I may not be a genius when it comes to money, and I do realize that unexpected obstacles come up, but this is a little ridiculous in my opinion. I’m frustrated that Tom‘s birthday is at the end of this month and I will not be able to get him a present.

I hate that a lot of companies have these crazy long contracts. Like my stupid security system – three year contract. I would cancel it if I could. But, alas, I’m only one year into the contract. (I should check to see what the penalty is to cancel early, though.)

I’m sorry I’m so whiney. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, though. My car will be paid off in a year – then that monthly payment will be able to help us out significantly. And, of course, I’m still looking to either win the lottery or find some alternative means of making money (Yes, Blue, I’m looking into PPP tonight, FINALLY).

Yup.

Went to the ER again tonight.

The whole shortness of breath thing was really starting to wear on me physically and mentally, and I couldn’t find a medication OTC that would fix it.

Then, after Elizabeth spoke to her mother (an RN), it was highly suggested to visit the ER to rule out a heart attack. (Yeah, that made my anxiety go into overdrive, which in turn, made my shortness of breath so much worse….)

Anyway – I knew my doctor. I went to high school with her. That was kind of weird… We’re not sure how we know each other, except passing each other through the halls, but we know we know each other… (Did that make sense?)

They gave me a benedryl shot. So, if this post is all over the place, that’s why.

In fact, I’m impressed I’ve made it this far into this post.

I’ve got an inhaler and a ‘script for some Visteril.

I wonder how much that costs (the ‘script).

I wonder how much I’ve racked up in ER visits this past month.

I wonder when this benedryl will start to wear off…

I wonder when my ear will unclog completely.

I wonder when I will stop typing.

I wonder if the Visteril will have the same affect as the benedryl.

I wonder if I’m spelling benedryl correctly. Spell check has no idea. Neither do I.

Time to sleep…

OOooooh, Today (er, yesterday) was Trish‘s birthday. Go tell her happy belated birthday. I called her in my benedryl-drunkenlike state to tell her happy birthday. I think she was entertained. I have no idea what I told her. I’m sure happy birthday was in there some where.

PS – I wanted to quickly tell anyone who was concerned: I did not drive home tonight. Elizabeth and her sister managed all that. Thank goodness.

My left ear itches.

Inside.

Deeeeeeep inside.

I can’t figure out how to scratch it.

It’s slowly driving me crazy.

This better mean its healing.

Yes, this is seriously my post today.

(Oh, and we’re going to the doctor today. Its routine.)

Well, it would appear that the bone in Tom‘s toe is infected.

And, as with any infection, they can move to other areas quickly. Obviously, this means that we really need to act quickly. We definitely don’t want the infection moving on to another toe or up into his foot!

Which means, Tom will have surgery on Monday to remove the affected bone. The doctor is hoping to save the toe, but he admits it doesn’t look promising. We’ll be there overnight, solely for precautionary measures.

The doctor also said that unless he can find some really good footwear and possibly custom foot plates for Tom‘s wheelchair, it’s almost bound to happen again.

Not horribly exciting, if you ask me.

On a completely different and upbeat note, wonderfully nice people are still finding their way over here from Crystal‘s place.

And, due to the kindness of strangers, the donations to make Tom‘s bathroom wheelchair accessible has reached $240! Isn’t that truly amazing! I am continuously in awe of the compassion of strangers.

We made it to the doctor today for Tom‘s pressure wounds. They’ve taken a turn – and not a great one.

On Tuesday, when Home Health was here, things were looking great. Honestly. We would of been in to the doctor so fast that heads would spin if I had thought anything wasn’t looking acceptable.

Now, we have to go back to the doctor for an MRI tomorrow to make sure the bone in Tom‘s foot isn’t infected. If it is, we could be looking at amputation again. This doctor doesn’t want to jump into things though, and wants to check into all other options. She knows that Tom can only count to 19 right now anyhow (since his pinky toe was amputated a while ago), and would feel bad if Tom could only count to 18.

She even mentioned flap surgery (I’m not providing a link, and if you’re smart, you won’t look for one) for Tom‘s rear, if it doesn’t start improving… Which, firstly, would be a ways down the road still. Secondly, I really don’t think we want to go that route. You can only do a flap surgery so many times. (The basic jist of flap surgery is pulling good skin over the wound so the wound will be closed.)

Anyway – of course, we’re not happy. Tom‘s stuck in bed, even more so than he was before.

We’re both really frustrated, of course.